How did my 12 year get through Year 7 with no smart phone?
Spoiler alert: It has not been as hard for him as I thought it would be.
He’s had a second hand Apple watch (no apps on it) which has been fine for what he’s needed so far. We got an e-SIM card from Better Roaming which made set up super easy and meant he didn’t need an iPhone of his own for it to be paired with.
The Apple watch has meant he can send brief messages and call on it.
That’s it.
He does loads of sports so he’s liked tracking all that too. Talking of tracking we settled on an Apple Watch as it has tracking capabilities which we felt was a good thing as he increasingly had lots more freedom. I have to say though that aside from his first few days of walking to school when I looked at the tracking info (which shows on my iPhone) we never check the tracking. It’s good to know it’s there though if we ever needed to know where he was.
He’s also got a basic Nokia 105 phone that he got in Year 6. It is hardly used now but was a solid first phone for him. That’s on a pay as you go sim so costs minimal to run.
Yes there have been small niggles like accessing school apps (he has to get an access code via my phone or use some on desktop versions) and not being part of some Whatsapp chats but he’s not felt excluded he tells us.
99% of his friends have smart phones. Some have social media, some don’t. He’s knows why we believe delaying smartphones & social media for a few years is the best path for him. We talk about it often.
We’ve not had one disagreement about phones yet. We’ve had no scares, upsets or issues in relation to phones or time spent on phones yet which I know is not the experience in many households where kids have smart phones.
Do I feel like he’s missed out?
He hasn’t been part of class WhatsApp chats or general WhatsApp chats with pals and this slightly worried me but on balance he’s also not woken up to hundreds of WhatsApp notifications or had links and images of hardcore porn in his inbox like some of his peers have. It is other kids habits that makes me nervous about WhatsApp. Expecting all kids to have sound digital habits around what they share and how much they message each other is not realistic at this age so I feel like it’s been the right choice so far.
He will get WhatsApp in the next few months (he is 13 soon) but I hope we’ll be helping him figure out how to use it without it becoming a massive distraction or portal to constantly seeing nonsense.
He has got a Balance phone we bought a few months ago and we’ll set that up for him soon. It is a phone that gives kids some access to maps, music, camera, WhatsApp and banking apps but no social media apps or internet browsing. I’ll report back on how that goes.
All in all though it’s been okay for him with no smart phone in year 7.
Don’t let the worry ‘they are the only one without a smart phone’ be the reason you give your child one. If you don’t believe it’s the right thing for your child you can delay.